Our family Christmas party

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Continuing with our tradition, we held our family Christmas party a few hours earlier, December 24.

Every year, whenever this event draws near I always get nervous. I want this party to go on and be continued because it is one of the event where we can remember our Mama, my wife. She started this Christmas party way back in 2002 even though there was just five of us in the family.

With her now gone, leaving only the four us, I'd like to to continue this in her memory and hope that the kids will also continue it even when I'm already gone.

I am really thankful, that even though the kids are already grown up, especially Ralph, they still cooperated and participated in the games. While I was anxious (and nervous), we had lots of fun because the kids were game. No one was a spoilsport, and each one even has a number for the intermission.

The simple foods shared for the Noche Buena also brought us great time.


This is just one many pictures taken for the party. All of them are post in my facebook account. Maybe later I'll upload them in my Multiply account too.

Some videos taken are currently being uploaded to my YouTube channel although I may continue the rest tomorrow. Some are for edit though.

I just would like to share this happiness that I feel right now that I was able to continue the tradition and preserve the memories of my wife.

Merry Christmas to everybody!

There's no room at the inn

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There's no room at the inn
Was always the reply
As they knocked at each door
Hoping to inquire

A child to be born
A child to behold
That could change the life
Of everyone in this world

But there's no more room
Where could they go?
Where would she give birth?
'til when she'll carry the pain?

There's no more room at the inn
No place for the child to be born
Would you find a little place in your heart...
and let Him in?

-----------------------------
Roy
December 22, 1999
4:48 PM
Subic, Olongapo
Philippines

If I have to do it all again...

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If I have to do it all again
I would not change a thing
I'll be taking the same bow
To be with you 'til the end

If I have to do it all again
I want everything to be the same
but I'll try to make you even more happy
and hope to lessen your pain

If I have to do it all again
I still want it to be with you
'cause no one else could ever be
the wife that you were to me

Happy anniversary Mama.

--------------------------
Roy
December 8, 2009
11:20 PM
Angeles City
Philippines


*today, December 8 was supposed to be our 18th wedding anniversary

They grow up too fast...

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Earlier this evening, my son Ralph asked me if he can go out to attend the debut of his classmate. He is already 17 years old, and this isn't exactly the first time he asked my permission for him to go out at night.

Somehow, the way he asked me today, it was as though I was awakened. Suddenly, I realized that he is not a boy anymore, and I noticed that these "going out" thing is getting more often lately.

Maybe I'm over-reacting again, but really, it's as if I felt that they grow up too fast.

My second son, Edgar, was out the whole day. He, together with classmate, took the whole Saturday to practice for a school presentation soon. Last week, he was coming home late at night almost everyday because they were doing some projects.

Angel, my youngest - my 11 year old daughter, asked me while we were having dinner if she can proceed to her classmate's house after school next Friday. They need to practice for their dance number for their Christmas party.

I blinked... and now, they all have a world of their own?!

Is this all too soon? Or am I just over-reacting? I don't know, both could be true. I really can't keep them to myself too long, I realize that. I just hope, that whatever values that their mother and I have taught to them would be enough to guide them as they continue and find their own world...

Still, I feel that they really grow up too fast... way too fast!

Another birthday... without her

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Last year, I was more adventurous as I prepared my first fruit salad and cooked spaghetti the celebrate my wife's birthday. This year though, because I was thrown into a different time zone and couldn't really get the courage to take on another "kitchen adventure," there was no cooking done.

But that doesn't mean we did not celebrate the important occasion yesterday. I have already been picturing the event in my mind, even days before it came. I made sure I would be able to celebrate it with my kids.

In the morning, make that early morning, I woke the kids up at 5 a.m. and we took a walk... a long walk, from our house to La Pieta cemetery where brought orchids and lighted candles for my wife.




After which, we took a quick breakfast on our way home.



When we reached home, we just stayed long enough to take a bath and get dressed. We attended the mass where we asked my wife's birthday be included in the mass intentions.

We went home after mass, and it was then a routine day for us, going through our chores. But in the afternoon, I went out to buy what we need to celebrate the occasion.

The first thing I bought was a palabok. After I brought it home, I went out again to buy my wife a birthday cake.



So now, it's complete. We can celebrate the day. But Angel asked for an ice cream, so we went to buy in a nearby convenience store.

After arranging all the food, we gather around the table to share the feast. But not without saying a little prayer for my wife, a thank you for all the blessings, and of course, the blessing of the food.

Before I let my children eat, I told my children that we should sing the "Happy Birthday" song. So we did, with much gusto I may say. I know, my wife may not be here physically, but I'm sure she can see and hear us.

Finally, I let the children eat... oops! After a few pictures, at least. And then, we shared the food on the table.


It's simple I know, but that's how we celebrate. It's just me and kids... and the memory of my wife.

"Happy birthday, Mama!"

Thank God, it's weekend!

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So I am employed.

Honestly, never longed for a weekend before like I did today. It used to be that any day of the week was a “weekend” for me, so to speak.

But since I started working, and have completed my first whole week as a regular-8-to-5-individual, I once again feel how important the REAL weekend is!

And no, I’m not complaining about working. Work is fine, I just need a little adjustment, that’s all. Maybe soon, I could recover from this “jet lag” that shocked my body rhythm… I only hope it’s soon… as in very, very soon.

Working doesn’t really pose any problem for me… I mean it shouldn’t. That is if I am willing to give up blogging altogether. But if you know me, you know I will not do that. NEVER!

Right now, aside from “adjustment,” words that play in mind include “vitamins”, “coping”, “working late”, “scheduling” and more.

Of course, there won’t be much of me online as I used to be. I need to set priorities. And right now, my work is a priority… next to my kids, of course.

That is why weekends, like this one, are a treasure! It gives me an opportunity to catch up on my writing, my whining, my ranting and so on, and so forth.

I may not be able to do “all” that I used to do, but at least it’s enough to scratch the itch.

Really, all I can say now is…”Thank God it’s weekend!”

Woof Contest Winners - November 20, 2009

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WOOF Contest – Top PicksPoetry

Jena Isle – “Terminus” - "Parting is such sweet sorrow."

dragon blogger – “Last Great Battle” - Fantasy poem about the battle of Ragnarok.

Zorlone – “Twin Souls” - Finding the other pair of an otherwise incomplete soul.

Jennifer M Scott – “Excuse me While I Unload” - A stream of conscious poem.

About Writing

RasoirJ – “Johnny Mercer and the Art of Reticence” - What fiction writers can learn from the great lyricist Johnny Mercer.

Brought to you by PlotDog Press with the Serial Suspense Screenplay "Intervention"

(WOOF participants should re-post all the links above by next Monday. The following links may be excluded as long as you include all the above links.)

Presenting the finest of the writer’s blogs by the bloggers who write them. Highlighting the top posts as chosen by the November 20, 2009 WOOF Contest participants. Want in to join the next WOOF? The next contest ends November 27. Submit a link to your best writing post of the last 3 weeks using the form on this page. Participants, repost the winning link list within a week and you’re all set.

Other WOOF Contestants for 11/20/09

Poetry

Roy – “Chapters” – “A short poem about different chapters in our life.”

Sire – “The Child Of God” - A poem of religion and zealots.

Jennifer M Scott – “Thanksgiving” - A poem for thanksgiving written in acrostic.

Jennifer M Scott – “Excuse me While I Unload” - A stream of conscious poem.

A new chapter unfolds

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After a series of disappointments and discrimination for my age, which was cleverly hidden in the word "overqualified," I finally got hired.

My previous poem Chapters was actually a prelude to this... not that I was expecting... but I was hoping.

and now, a new chapter unfolds. I don't know how it will affect me, my family and my blogging, but I hope it's for the better... and I really wish that this time, it will be for keeps.

I better psyche myself up... "I am still efficient... my employer made the right decision for hiring me... I can still deliver... I am"

Tomorrow is the big day... the day I will write on the first page in my new chapter.

Chapters

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there is no end
a new page is turned over to reveal the next one
life is a continuing process

of pains and joys
of lessons and learning
of looking forward and looking back

every loss, every triumph
are nothing but episodes
as we continue to write
our own book of life

and when one chapter ends
another one begins

there is no end
life is a continuing process

------------------------------------------
Roy
November 12, 2009
7:53 PM
Angeles City
Philippines

A possible job interview

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I don't know if I would be excited or not. Next week, there is a possibility that I might be called for another job interview.

Since my sister arrived last week, they have been calling friends and contacts from their previous employment here, asking them if they would have vacancy for me. Yes, they have trying to find work for me.

I am not a complete bum as I've been earning quite a decent amount from the internet. Not big, but enough to sustain our daily needs. But my sister and my brother-in-law feel that I should find a real job, so they've been trying to find one for me.

So next week, I might be called for another interview.

Interviews don't intimidate me, but it seems I have grown tired of them. Maybe because I dread going through the process of meeting people who can't see passed beyond my age - my credentials notwithstanding. In fact, my credentials seem to be a disadvantage as they always say I'm overqualified, which I always believe was their courteous way of referring to my age.

But hey! What's another rejection anyway? It's not like the first time I'll be discriminated for applying for a job beyond 40 years old.

Looking good... literally

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To look good - your eyesight, I mean, you don't have to look nerdy. With the New Arrivals from Zenni Optical, you can have more choices from the wide arrays of stylish frames. Check out their Holiday Fun Eyeglasses. Of course, the $8 Prescription Zenni Glasses they have been popular with are still available.

Things don't always go our way...

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Isn't is frustrating? You ask for something and then you are given another?

I seek respite for my father... and it was given... permanently.

Can I complain? I'm afraid I can't. Maybe because I wasn't too specific in my request. I forgot, it can go both ways and still have the request granted.

I can't curse. I know there's nothing more I can do.

It's too late... too late to bridge the gap... too late to build a bond... too late to establish anything... it's just too late.

It's really is frustrating when things don't go our way.

Now, I can only wish and pray... that my father will have eternal peace...

Woof Contest Winners - October 23, 2009

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WOOF Contest – Top Picks

Poetry

Zorlone – “Storm” - A voice to the storm's awesomely destructive power. This was written in admiration and respect to its might.

Dragon Blogger – “Ghost Whispers” - Poem about ghosts of the past, read aloud by the author.

Jennifer M Scott – “Open Book” - Losing oneself.

Fiction

Roy/Angel – “Modern day Cinderella story” - An original adaptation of my 11-year old daughter of the Cinderella story.

Lauren Salkin – “Dead Mice Don't Eat Cheese” – This post is based on a true story. So, what is actually true? The mouse, the cat, and me, of course. I did grab the cat with the mouse in its mouth, tried to shake it from the cat's mouth, succeeded in doing so, then subsequently stepped on the mouse, killing it.

Brought to you by PlotDog Press with the Serial Suspense Screenplay "Intervention"

(WOOF participants should re-post all the links above by next Monday. The following links may be excluded as long as you include all the above links.)

Presenting the finest of the writer’s blogs by the bloggers who write them. Highlighting the top posts as chosen by the October 23, 2009 WOOF Contest participants. Want in to join the next WOOF? The next contest ends October 30. Submit a link to your best writing post of the last 3 weeks using the form on this page. Participants, repost the winning link list within a week and you’re all set.

Other WOOF Contestants for 10/23/09

Prose / About Writing

Roy – “How do you prepare for death?” - How do we want death to come to us? Can we really be prepared for it?

Fun and Fearless – “We Filipinos Are...” - It is about an encounter with someone who thought negatively about Filipinos and how a Filipino writer helps me gain pride for my people.

Fun and Fearless – “Have You Got Style?” - It is about a person's comment on how writers should write.

Poetry

Roy – “Dreams do come true” - We just have to keep the faith... cause dreams do come true.

Dragon Blogger – “The Intruder” - Poem about an invading virus and defensive measures, crafted with random words.

Another hurdle...

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I won't lie. I am not that close to my father. I don't have memories of piggy-back rides nor weekend afternoon kite flying.

Still, he is father, and I do feel some attachment with him, one way or another.

Yesterday, we took him to the hospital. He has difficulty of breathing and an on-and-off hiccups. As expected, he was admitted. They were planning to take him to the ICU at first, but I didn't approve.

They were planning to insert a tube in his nose, I believe they called it the GNT, because he no longer eats. We refused because knowing our father, he might pull it out which could cause more trouble.

Fortunately, we were able to make him take his medicines. At least we can justify our decision not to allow the tube insertion. HE WAS TAKING HIS MEDICINES.

This afternoon, I arrived at the hospital and found the hospital personnel taking him out of his room and transferring him to the ICU. As he passed by me, I saw him - unconscious, weak, with tube in his mouth for the oxygen... a picture that I've seen before.

His body organs, as the nurse explained to me, can no longer perform their duties. He no longer breaths by himself, that's why they need to take him to the ICU where the oxygen machine is. When they finally allow me to see him, they have already placed the GNT through his nose.

With the oxygen tube in his mouth, there is no way for him to take the medicines orally, the nurse explained.

I was just silent... not knowing what to say... not knowing what to think.

By some stroke of miracle of miracle, maybe he can pull through this one...

I hope... I pray...

Her father's daugther

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I have written in a previous post about my baby being a scriptwriter, Here I am making a follow-up post about it.

Her story, a modern day Cinderella story is now a guest post in my Short Stories Blog, and I couldn't be any prouder. It was the first time that I read her story actually, as I was posting it on my blog.

Save for some required polishing on grammar here and there, I can say that she got a good storyline... or maybe because she's just my daughter?

I don't know. But based on what I read, I am now contemplating on finally putting up her own blog. The only problem though, is that she's not really too excited about it - having her own blog that is.

But how I wish I could really develop the writer in her, without being pushy.

Why not visit my short story blog and read her story to see if she indeed has the making of a writer.

Call me a proud father, I don't care... because honestly, I am.

Dreams do come true

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Dreams do come true
Believe me
They do

Maybe not when we want them
They come true when
They needed to be

Not how we want them to be
But even better
Isn’t it swell?

Dreams do come true
I hope that mine
Will inspire you

-------------------------------
Roy
October 15, 2009
8:20 PM
Angeles City
Philippines




Inspirational Thoughts and Stories from Bloggers All Over the World

the fullfilment of my dream... a dream shared with 26 great writers from the blogosphere... a dream made possible by the geniune faith of our Jena Isle to our writing

31 inspiring thoughts and stories from 27 bloggers...


share with our dreams... share our passion...

Visit Jena Isle's post to order your copy of the book...

.... and believe... that dreams do come true....

How do you prepare for death?

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How do you want death to come?

Can we really prepare for it?

When my wife passed away last year, we were in a way prepared for it. We knew it would come, so it wasn’t really a surprise.

But, were we prepared? I thought we were.

We were prepared and accepted the fact the she has to go… that she needs to rest. Later on, we realized that while we were prepared for her ‘departure,’ we weren’t really prepared to live our life without her.

It was a long bout, and every now then, the pain of that reality still hurt.

But we were aware of it coming.

Yesterday, my mother called to tell me a bad news. The eldest son of my cousin died.

He was only 19 years old.

I haven’t seen the boy before really as I seldom see my cousins, but I knew he was healthy.

The boy was on his way home.

He was just crossing the street in front of the subdivision where he lives, when he met an accident – he was run over by an oncoming vehicle.

That was instant. No warning.

I can only imagine the pain that my cousin felt when he heard the news. And I don’t think they were prepared.

How should death really come? Is there really a way to prepare for it?

I don’t think we can.

This only means that we should treasure every living hour that we have. Make it worthwhile. Take every opportunity to show and express our love for our family… because I believe, that is the only way to prepare for death…

…pre-paint it with beautiful memories.

Reflections through songs

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Aside from my poetry book being published, another dream of mine is hearing my songs being played on air. No, I don’t necessarily have to sing them, other singers can do better justice to them. That is if they do want to sing them.

Yes, aside from poems, I have also written some songs. I’ve been writing since I have learned to play the guitar. Call it self-admiration, but I’d like to believe that my songs are decent enough and worthy of being played on air (compared to more nonsensical songs polluting the air waves now)

Whenever I have an opportunity, I join songwriting contests in the hope that I might get the breaks. I also sent samples of my works to recording studios that I hear of. But all these efforts really proved futile. Not even a feedback nor an acknowledgement from recording companies that they have received my songs… as for the contests, when professional songwriters are included, can you really expect to be noticed.

Now, 41 years old and running out of time. This dream of mine might remain just like that… only a dream. Maybe some things are not really meant for some people. Getting recognized through my songs may not be for me it seems.

But I know, getting the breaks or not… songs will surely get written.

Definitely they will.

Angel, the script writer

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Finally, I was able to get hold of the PC. Well, because Angel was writing a script for their school club's play since she arrived home from school this afternoon. It took her almost three hours to finish it. She have actually written a draft of it on paper and just polished and typed it now on the computer.

I was tempted to peek, but I didn't. I'm afraid I could be of any of the two - an overacting stage father or a overacting critic. So I just let her be. She do ask me from time to time while she was typing though.

When she was finished, and while printing the script, she was happy and even dancing. I took it as a sign that she was satisfied with what she wrote. It was by the way a script for a modern day version of Cinderella, which was the theme required for her (I couldn't write anything myself when I am given parameters).

Her only concern now is that her classmates are not that really appreciative and cooperative. I hope that they do work on the play seriously so my daughter would get encouraged in her writing.

Maybe someday I'll post her script in my blog, or maybe she'll post it in her own blog. But until then, I won't take a peek... unless she asked me to, of course.

Breakfast today

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It's Saturday, another weekend. Unlike the previous days, cooking breakfast was always done in a hurry... so I need to wake up earlier (4 a.m.) to be able to cook breakfast and prepare the children's packed lunch.

But today, I still woke up early (6 a.m. is still early for a Saturday) so I had time to prepare the breakfast that I have been planning to prepare for a long time - fried rice, 'tuyo' and scrambled eggs... and since I was also able to buy some tomatoes, I added 'sarsiado' on the side.

So there I was, working in the kitchen by my lonesome while the children were still enjoying their sleep... and cooked (in the following order) eggs, tuyo, sarsiado and finally, the fried rice.

I have only one frustration though, I still haven't perfected the 'art of making tutong' on fried rice. I love that crunchy rice at the bottom of the pan... I wish I could make it without burning the fried rice ;)

and finally, at 8 a.m. I called the kids so we all can have our breakfast together... why wait for September 28 for a family meal? When it should be done at every opportunity available?

tuyo, scrambled eggs, sarsiado, fried rice, tutong
complete set up... and of course, coffee for me ;)

I really don't know how long they can keep with my cooking :)

*cooking for weekdays' breakfast of course is a different story ;)

*more pictures here

First Bundle of Joy

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First Bundle of Joy

I never thought I'd feel
The joy I felt when I saw you
I never thought I'd see
A face as beautiful as yours

So young and so innocent
Yet so full of love
I held your hands and then I feel
All the love flowing inside

You're my first bundle of joy
And you bring me so much happiness
You're my first bundle of joy
You bring me so much love

And when the day is blue
All goes well when I see you
And with your sweet smile
You wipe away the tears in my eyes

And there's nobody else
Who can make me feel
The love and joy that I felt
Since the day you came

---------------------------
Roy
January 1993
Angeles City
Philippines


A song I wrote for my son Ralph Emerson when he was just 3 months olds... today, he turns 17... how time flies...

Ralph at 4 years old

Ralph at 12

High school graduation

always the playful one

at the EIB 2009 awarding

Ralph and his new cellphone

Happy Birthday Ralph!

My Angel is ranked no. 8!

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The report card for the first grading period was finally released, and I was surprised and glad that my Angel is ranked no. 8 in the class.

Yes, I know it's still a big leap to the top spot, but hey! My baby is included in the class Top 10, and this she did by herself, because I wasn't able to really teach her in her studies nor do her brothers can help her all the time.

I am really glad that she is self-reliant and would do her studies even without prodding. She would be doing her homework the moment that we arrived home. At least all her efforts paid off.

She could do better, I know. I told her that, but there's no pressure.

Whether she gets to the Top 10, I'm still proud of her, because I can see her efforts.

She's my Angel.

WOOF Contest winners September 4, 2009

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WOOF Contest – Top Picks

Poetry

Dragon Blogger – “Burning Alive” - A dark poem about burning alive.

Roy – “I cried again...” - Crying for no reason at all... but later, I found out why.

Zorlone – “Unafraid to Love” - A dialogue between extraordinary characters about love, sacrifice, and loyalty.

Creative Non-Fiction / About Writing

Holly Jahangiri – “Interview: Thoughts on Blogging” - I decided to throw a relaxed little virtual get-together with some of my “Jedi Blogger” friends, just to have a chat about blogging… So although we live oceans apart, imagine us gabbing at a little table in an open-air café, enjoying a beer, a cup of tea, or maybe sharing a great big bowl of Bulalo.

Fiction

H. Benjamin Petrie – “The New House” - A boy meets a girl he knows in town and shows her his new house.

Brought to you by PlotDog Press with the Serial Thriller Web Novel "Dead Play"

(WOOF participants should re-post all the links above by next Monday. The following links may be excluded as long as you include all the above links.)

Presenting the finest of the writer’s blogs by the bloggers who write them. Highlighting the top posts as chosen by the September 4, 2009 WOOF Contest participants. Want in to join the next WOOF? The next contest ends September 11. Submit a link to your best writing post of the last 3 weeks using the form on this page. Participants, repost the winning link list within a week and you’re all set.

Other WOOF Contestants for 09/04/09

Creative Non-Fiction / About Writing

Jennifer M Scott – “Bull Fighting with the Vortex” - My current woes with writing.

Poetry

Roy – “I'm out of rhyme” - A poem about the time I don't know what to write...

Zorlone – “A Wizard's Sympathy” - Taking Jenn Scott's poetry challenge: Use the line “On salvation’s road laden with lavender lollipops” in a poem.

Jennifer M Scott – “Soul's Contentment” - A love poem.

I adopted another "baby"

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I can't believe it! I adopted a new "baby" and now there's an addition to the family!


I named him Benz, from Benjie, the boy who was looking for his mother in the latest story on my Short Stories Blog.

While Angel and I were in the public jeepney on our way to her school, she saw Benz on the side of the street wandering all by himself. She took pity because he was so small and all alone. She wanted me to get him and take him home so we could take care of him. He seems so fragile when we saw him.

If only Angel won't be late, we could have gotten off the jeepney and took him right away.

On my way back, I went to the place where we saw him... he was gone. The place where we saw him was in front of an office and I saw a security guard at the side... and behind him, in the corner I saw the dog.

I asked him if it was his and he said no, he just found him there when he came in. Apparently somebody left the dog there. Then I asked him if he would take care of the dog, if not, I'll take him home so we can take care of him... as I promised Angel.

Luckily, he gave the dog to me.

As I picked him up, he was shaking... either from the cold or from fear or both... but I whispered him not to worry, he will be taken care of.

When I arrived home, Ralph, my eldest, immediately took care of him. We gave Benz milk and Ralph tended to him while he was eating/drinking. He would whine whenever he is left alone. So Ralph stayed with him for a while.

Here he is, staying right beside my son Ralph

I can't wait 'til Angel gets home from school and find Benz... my only problem right now, I don't think I have baby-ready Chuchi... she's outside the house now, while Benz, because of his size is staying inside for a while.

Excited for Christmas this year

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It’s too early, I know… but I’m in the Philippines and the start of ‘ber’ months signal the coming of Christmas here… it’s the longest celebration of the holidays that ends in January of the following year.

I don’t know why, but it seems that I’m too excited for Christmas this year.

Sure, we were able to celebrate it last year, we had our traditional Christmas party and the kids were happy… but I know in my heart that the spirit wasn’t with me then.

This year, I’d like to make it up with my kids… perhaps, make it one of the best, if not the best Christmas that they will have… even if there are only four us.

Does that mean that I’m through with the ‘emotional rollercoaster ride’ I was in? Have I overcome the feeling of loneliness and longing for my wife?

I don’t know, but what I know is that, the best way for me to show my love for my wife now is through our kids… and that I’ll do.

After going through a lot of firsts without her, I’ve come to realize that we were ‘not really without her.’

I see her through my kids… I even see her in me! Our ways, our actions… our relationships.

And this year, I’m going to celebrate it with her -- through our kids. I gave them a so-so holiday last year, and this time I promise to make up for it.

With the newfound zest and learning to know who I am and what I can do… I can make this year a better Christmas for them.

Yes, I really am excited for Christmas this year.

WOOF Contest winners August 28, 2009

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WOOF Contest – Top Picks

Fiction / Short Story

Zorlone – “The Night Duty” - A night like any other night at the Emergency Room, but not for Madelin. She is an extraordinary nurse with a generous heart.

Poetry

Jennifer M Scott – “A Night with Jupiter” - Another surreal poem on life.

Dragon Blogger – “Vagabond Murder” - A dark night where a homeless person's life is taken.

Roy – “This Too Will Pass” - A short poem about holding on...

Brought to you by PlotDog Press with the Serial Suspense Screenplay "Intervention"

(WOOF participants should re-post all the links above by next Monday. The following links may be excluded as long as you include all the above links.)

Presenting the finest of the writer’s blogs by the bloggers who write them. Highlighting the top posts as chosen by the August 28, 2009 WOOF Contest participants. Want in to join the next WOOF? The next contest ends September 4. Submit a link to your best writing post of the last 3 weeks using the form on this page. Participants, repost the winning link list within a week and you’re all set.

Other WOOF Contestants for 08/28/09

Fiction / Short Story

Roy – “So close...” - About a son's search for his mother...

Poetry

Zorlone – “The rat was a goner” - Finally, a clean house! Find out how a pest was rid of by a determined boy.

Do I really need glasses?

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It's almost 2 a.m. and I'm still blogging. No worry I feel my eyes strained most of the times. Do I really need to get eyeglasses? Can those $ 8 Rx eyeglasses from Zenni Optical really help me? I know, they're stylish and all, but what about performance?

I've read some reviews, maybe they are what they claim they are. Don't know really, cause I haven't tried it yet... maybe soon, when I can no longer read what I'm typing here.

But as for designs, these are My favorite high fashion eyeglasses:






Next to performance, another consideration is the price. With Zenni's $8 price, I guess that makes it practical.

Speaking of practical, here's an interesting article featuring practical tips from the interview of Greg Karp, author of Living Rich by Spending Smart. He even mentioned Zenni in the interview because he was one. The article is called How You Can Start Spending Smart. Nice read, do check it out.

I'm out of rhyme

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I'm out of rhyme, and what a time lose it
'thought I was on fire and my keyboard was smoking

I'm out rhyme, could it happen just like that?
Like I was just singing and my notes all went flat

I'm out of rhyme, now what could be worse?
Oh, did I mention I also have a running nose?

I'm out of rhyme, should I call it a day?
and hopefully tomorrow, things will be okay

I'm out of rhyme, isn't it obvious?
typing lines here like I'm feeling delirious

I'm out of rhyme, now where is my muse?
I can't find it, and it's giving me the blues

I'm out of rhyme, so I better just stop
as I step back... can you believe what I got?!

I got seven rhymes!

--------------------------
Roy
August 27, 2009
9:40 PM
Angeles City
Philippines


*an attempt to write a list poem, in

The Paluwagan at home

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With the prodding of my son Edgar Allan, we just started with our 'Paluwagan' today. This isn't actually the first time we're doing it. We did way back 2005 or 2006, when Mama was still with us.

What motivated to have Paluwagan at home then was that my eldest son, Ralph, joined a Paluwagan in school with his classmates. Based on experience, we know at most Paluwagan die after the first few members already received their 'salary,' to the disadvantage of other members.

To discourage him from joining, we had our own paluwagan then at home. It was only stopped because of the vacation from school, and we never got to start it again.

This past few weeks, Edgar has been egging each one of us to start with Paluwagan anew. Ralph and Angel, for some reason isn't really hot on the idea, but Edgar just won't give up.

So, to make all those begging and teasing stop, I finally decided to start it for them. I guess he needed money (cell phone load, I suppose). With only P5 per day contribution until Friday, the designated payee would receive P125 on Saturday (or Friday night).

Well, if it can teach them finance and savings, why not?

This Too Will Pass

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feeling down and so low
but I know it won't be long
like all the problem that has befallen me
this too will pass

like a storm that comes at night
destroying everything in its flight
but in the morning it gives way to a day so bright
this too will pass

for every night, there will be day
for every darkness, there will be light
for every doubts, there'll be assurance
for every pain, there'll be healing

the anxieties, the loneliness,
the burdens and the pain
pressures and all the tensions,
they too... will pass

----------------------------
Roy
October 12, 1999
4:00 PM
Subic, Olongapo
Philippines

The Truth

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In my previous post, I wrote about the poem “I'm not afraid” and said that it was written by my 14 year old son, Edgar Allan.

That was true, although, only partially. I also said that it was my daughter Angel Liza, 11 years old, who puts the poem into writing because Edgar Allan only commits the poem in his memory… unfortunately, I didn’t understand the last part of Angel’s declaration.

It was only when I talked to her again that the poem turned out to be a “collaboration” of sorts. Because Edgar Allan doesn’t know how to finish the poem, and it actually my daughter, Angel Liza, who provided the last two lines.

Here’s the poem again, with the correct credits provided:

I’m Not Afraid
By: Edgar Allan dela Cruz
and Angel Liza dela Cruz

I’m not afraid of flying
I’m just afraid of falling
I’m not afraid of water
I’m just afraid of drowning
I’m not afraid of fire
I’m just afraid of burning
I’m not afraid of dying
I’m just afraid you’ll cry

The authors

Angel Liza and Edgar Allan dela Cruz

"I'm not afraid"

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Yesterday morning, as I was cleaning the house after the children left for school, I found a piece of paper lying around. I picked it up with the intention of throwing it in the garbage bin, when I noticed that what was written in it was in stanza format.

Curious, I read what was written.

It was a short poem by my son Edgar. I was surprised because of all my kids, he was the least to be expected to express himself in poetry. He’s into music and arts, but poetry?

It was undated, and I wondered why it was written on a loose paper and lying around. I kept it, and thought of posting it here in my blog, to at least preserve it for him (he is not aware that I’m posting it here).

Here’s the “poem”

I’m Not Afraid
By: Edgar Allan dela Cruz

I’m not afraid of flying
I’m just afraid of falling
I’m not afraid of water
I’m just afraid of drowning
I’m not afraid of fire
I’m just afraid of burning
I’m not afraid of dying
I’m just afraid you’ll cry


Short I know, and maybe mushy. But hey, it’s my son’s, and one that I definitely don’t expect. Honestly, I never knew he has it in him.

As I asked my daughter Angel late in the afternoon about the poem, she said it was her who put it into writing, as my son Edgar was reciting.

My son has no intention of writing it, and Angel said he ‘made’ it about last year.

That gives me more reason to want to preserve the poem… and made me think too…

Is there more to the poem that what was put into writing?

'The paper'

The Author

Chicken Soup for the Soul: Moms & Sons

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Last April, I stumbled upon the website of Dee through Jan’s tweet. I checked the link and I was led to her contest for Mother’s Day.

She was offering two Chicken Soup for the Soul books, one is a book between Moms and Sons, and the other is about Moms and Daughters.

The mechanics was simple – comment on the post and convince her why you deserve the book, tweet about the contest, or write a post in your blog about the contest.

It was supposed to be for mothers, but since I am a single parent now, I thought I would qualify as a ‘mother’ too… so I joined the contest.

I commented on her post, tweeted the contest and I wrote a post in my blog where I explained why a father like me would want a Chicken Soup book for mothers.

Yes, I did all three to show Dee how badly I wanted the books.

Luckily, I won, and Dee informed me that she will send me the Chicken Soup for the Soul – Moms and Sons.

I was excited!

Last week, I finally received the book!

Now, I have something to read, where a father like me can learn about relationships with the sons… from a mother's point of view.


I am excited to read the book…. thanks Dee!

WOOF Contest winners July 10, 2009

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WOOF Contest – Top Picks

Poetry

Dragon Blogger – “Late Afternoon Nightmare” - A poem about trying to catch an afternoon nap which only ends in a nightmare.

Roy – “unpoetic” - Senseless lines... or are they?

Zorlone – “Blank page” - "Such a true prose, the "process" is as you describe. The blank page a canvas for thoughts and inspiration, ready to pour out from within." Eric S.

Zorlone – “Just another bus commute” - "...That chance may never come again..but then... I'm sure somewhere down the road, you'll finally meet your princess." - JenaIsle

Fiction / Prose / Memoir

Roy – “The Short Story Blogger” - A blogger... his life... his stories...

(WOOF participants should re-post all the links above by next Monday. The following links may be excluded as long as you include all the above links.)

Presenting the finest of the writer’s blogs by the bloggers who write them. Highlighting the top posts as chosen by the July 10, 2009 WOOF Contest participants. Want in to join the next WOOF? The next contest ends July 17. Submit a link to your best writing post of the last 3 weeks using the form on this page. Participants, repost the winning link list within a week and you’re all set.

Other WOOF Contestants for 07/10/09

Fiction / Prose / Memoir

Jennifer M Scott – “Cinnamon French Toast” - How making french toast spawns a memory or two.

Webbielady – “The Fish Is Caught From Its Mouth” - Indeed, the fish is baited in the mouth, thus, to keep quiet sometimes gives us safety.

Roy – “He is still the same son after all...” - Rediscovering my long lost relationship with my son...

Poetry

Jennifer M Scott – “Haiku Series 19” - A series of haikus based on a variety of subjects.

Jennifer M Scott – “Waterlily” - A surreal poem and it includes another picture drawn by me.

To take care of my sight

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All those blogging, whether I admit it or not is really taking its toll me, especially my sight. While I don’t want to admit it, I may require eyeglasses soon, that’s why the $ 8 Rx eyeglasses is really appealing to me.

I’ve seen Zenni Optical on TV!!! At least through the links in the web, I’ve also read High Five for Zenni Optical, so maybe they could be a good choice.

So I am not allowed to celebrate

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After a long delay, finally we can go out and celebrate Father's Day.

On the day of the occasion itself, my youngest and middle children were sick... fine, we can celebrate after a week...

Following weekend, my oldest son was sick... okay, fine there's always next week. Granted it was a rediscovery for both of us, he was still sick.

Finally yesterday, to celebrate the weekend that nobody was sick - the long delayed Father's Day celebration was finally pushed through... or so, I thought.

While we were at the movies, I received a text from my sister, my father was admitted to the hospital because of pneumonia.

Swell! Celebration cut short and we rushed to the hospital.

Now, I don't really claim to be so close to my father. The fact is, I was not... never have been. But being older now, and a father myself, I am slowly... albeit awkwardly, trying to build a relationship between us two.

He is my father after all.

And while we're in the hospital, I was thinking... "what kind of cosmic forces are plotting against me?! Now, that my kids are safe, and I didn't get sick, it has go outside, yet still within the family."

Coincidences?

I hope so.

The problem now, is while I would want to keep watch over my father, I can't. I have to attend to my kids who would be attending school... and I have to work, to keep sending them to school.

My father is already old... these past few days, my mother always tell me that he is already saying a lot of nonsense - a sign of senility, to say the least, and he is not really in the peak of health, and he moves slower now... much slower.

Now that he's in the hospital... I'm seeing flashes of images... nightmares... I hope the worst won't happen.

The gap hasn't been patched yet... the bridge is being built...

I hope he gets through it.... I hope he gets well...

He is still the same son after all

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I was really depressed, frustrated and feeling low. What happened last year was repeated – three kids getting sick one after the other.

Angel and Edgar were already well and finally went to school.

Ralph’s fever just started last Friday.

Of my three kids, Ralph, who is the eldest, is the one that I don’t want to get sick, because he is the one who has the lowest threshold on pain.

True enough, he was always whining, almost crying at the slightest hint of pain in his body.

I don’t know if it has anything to do with being a firstborn child. We were always there for him, and wouldn’t let anything harm him.

Because he was the only one then, we can look after him better. That’s why he rarely gets sick when he was still young.

But he got sick… and was always crying. I couldn’t even leave him for a while – so I stopped writing, left the computer and just sat beside him on the bed.

To entertain him and let his mind off the pain (imagined or true), he is feeling, I talked to him. I asked if he still recall what we used to do when he was still small….

We used to walk around the neighborhood without any particular direction, he was barely four or five years old then.

Every afternoon, we would go out, walk around. Sometimes, we would fly kite in the vacant lot just a block away from our house…

We used to go swimming then too, all three of us – Ralph, my wife and me. We wouldn’t even wait for any occasion to go, anytime we decide, we pack and call on the tricycle at the corner to take us to the resort…

He was smiling… he remembered…

He remembered too, as he told me, the things he did when he was small – how he got burned by the flat iron because he touched it out of curiosity, the same curiosity that pushed him to touched those grills at the back of the refrigerator, and how I found him once stuck on the freezer because he tried to lick the ice at the sides.

We were laughing… it was a very rare chit-chat that has become a luxury for us two – Ralph and I.

Lately I have been trying to push him to grow up, making him responsible… because I need him to be. He is after all the eldest of the three.

He is not really the rebellious type, but in his own little ways he does… by going home late without even texting me… and teasing Angel even though he knows it irritates me no end.

Maybe those weren’t intentional, maybe it was just me…. whatever.

The closeness that we used to have when he was still small wasn’t there anymore… as if we were alienated from each other.

But because he was sick, I had to talk to him gently… lowered my voice, so as to calm him and his pain…

And because he was sick, he too had to stay put, listened to me, and at the same time talk in a gentler voice too.

Our conversation was nice… one that didn’t happen for a long time.

And I was surprised, because he put his head on my lap – imagine a 16 year old boy, sleeping with his head on his father’s lap… and he slept good… he was calm… and I realized, it was something that I miss…

I too was able to fall asleep while seated, because I can’t move lest I’ll be waking him up. So I just stayed there and savored the moment that my son and I were close to each other once more…

That was when I realized that, he is still the same son that I used to have more than 10 years ago.

Why?

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This was supposed to be a post to say that my daughter and middle son are finally well and are already going to school... and how I was looking forward to a late Father's Day celebration this weekend.

I even thought it was perfect timing since Transformers 2 is showing.

but I have to pass one more test...

Last night, while I was drafting my original post, my eldest son came home from school. He said he wasn't feeling well, especially while he was still in school. He slept after having his dinner.

At around 1AM, I heard him calling. He asked for medicine because he has a headache, and he was feeling cold. I checked him, he has fever.

Now, he's in bed complaining of various pains in his body.

This isn't new to me. The exact thing happened last year - first it was Edgar, and then Angel, and finally Ralph.

Ralph's sickness came a little late this time, but it didn't fail.

Why?

Am I amiss in my fatherly duties? Don't I know how to take care of my kids?

Why?

You might say I'm making a big fuzz out of this. Maybe I do. But, shouldn't I? If you were in my place, wouldn't you?

I thought so. That's easy for you to say.

When you're on the outside looking in, wisdom is easy to deliver, but unless on your on someone else's shoes, and understand everything that's happening...

Some father's day!

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Yes indeed! Some father's day it turn out to be!

As if my son's swollen lips wasn't enough, my baby has to catch fever!

She was already fine last night, after giving her medicine, buying her comfort food (her favorites, especially when she's sick). She was feeling well when we slept yesterday.

But today, we woke up again with her feeling hot. Her temperature reads 40! She looks worst! She have already taken her medicine, and her last temperature reading was 39.5, and she said she feels better.

Some father I'm turning out to be!

My son's lower lips isn't getting any better either.

The disadvantage of not having a mother. Unfortunately, it has to happen to my children.

Some father's day indeed!

Sa Ugoy Ng Duyan

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Last year, I tried my hand on video-editing. I made two projects, just simple ones though - a series of photo slides, and a music background

This one, I made in memory of my wife, I hope you like it...

Sa Ugoy Ng Duyan

Thank you

She wants to be free

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Meek and frail she was, fragile as can be
Seeing her grow before my eyes… so fast
All the time I will be right beside her
A promise given, keeping it ‘til end
Forever my baby, she’ll always be

Yet one unsuspecting morning, she said
In tiny voice, yet seems thunder to me
A request to let go, from my baby
She seems to be so sure when she asked me
“Can I go to school alone? Please Daddy?”

Immeasurable anxiety felt
Has she grown faster than I thought she has?
My baby has become a young lady
She now wants out of my protective watch
Can I really let go of my baby?

------------------------------------------------
Jenanian verse
Roy
June 11, 2009
11:10 PM
Angeles City
Philippines

A father's dilemma

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This is just another one of those exaggerated anxieties.

This time, it was brought to me by my Angel... yes, my little darling caused me anxiety this morning.

No, she didn't do anything. She just asked a question... a simple, innocent question...

"Dad, when can I go to school by myself?"



I was surprised, caught off-guard so to speak. My baby wants to go to school alone. She asked this while we were on a public jeepney on the way to her school.

Everyday, I take her to school in morning and I come back in the afternoon to pick her up. This is our daily routine. I am self-employed (read: jobless), so I have all the time in the world. Quite frankly, I am enjoying it.

I thought my baby was enjoying it too.

She said she just want to experience being solo (is this her way of telling me to move back?), she asked me to allow her even for a day, just for the experience (I know how freedom feels, I know she'll want more of it).

Reminds me of the anxiety I felt when my son was going on his first field trip... unimaginable!

Now, it's Angel's turn to seek her independence.

But she's only 11 years old! So young... so small... so fragile...

Unfortunately (for me), her request was not without basis.

One - her best friend lives near our house, and they can go home together, so she won't be necessarily travelling alone.

Two - with the installation of traffic lights near her school makes crossing the street not as dangerous as it was before.

Three - on her way home, she won't even have to cross the street!

I now imagined myself going out of the house, looking at the street waiting for her to appear within my view every 4:30 in the afternoon... and not until I get a glimpse of her will I be able to feel relax.

I promised my wife I will take care of our baby. That's why I see myself looking after her as long as I can, even watching her in school 'til she reached high school (maybe even college)... she's my only baby.

Now, this early, she is telling me to "back off" in the most subtle way... is she ready to be independent?

Am I ready to let her be independent?

I know, I'm over-reacting.

Writer's block

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I thought I was good, I thought I was an average, if not a good writer. But I've been going to and fro in all my blogs this morning and I can't seem to find anything to write.

What gives?

I have to write.... at least for me to survive.

Another day will soon pass and I haven't submitted anything yet to my employer.

It seems that I have exhausted myself last month, that I can't put anything out now.

Is that even possible? Or is writer's block just a lame excuse for a writer's laziness.

How can I even consider myself as an influential blogger when I can't even push myself now to write anything. Why do these times come? I hate it when it does.

What now?

emptiness

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I long
for your smile
for your kiss
for your touch

no more
shall I hear
shall I see
shall I feel

memories
are all there is
are all I have
are all I need

I miss you… I really do

-------------------------------
Roy
May 29, 2009
7:52 PM
Angeles City
Philippines

Do I really want to be influential?

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I'm at a crosscroad.

After years of blogging, it seems that I am really about to accomplish something out of it.

Do I really want it?

Admittedly, just being included in such a list brings me into a state of euphoria. And I haven't even won yet!

This 'influential blogger' thing is really getting into my system. I want it. I know I do.

But part of me says, "Are you ready?" Then there's the more familiar side which says, "There you go again expecting. Do you really think you can win?!"

This thing won't be handed down to me on a silver platter. No, it won't. It requires efforts. Lots of work.

And that, I'm founding out early on.

Already, it has taken a lot from me. I'm so focus in the contest that I tend to drift from my online work which I need badly. And I have never been so conscious of my posts! "Will this be a hit?", "Will they comment on this one?", "Will it earn me another nomination?". "Is this clever enough to solicit a nod?"

And I'm not even talking about the grammar yet!

Maybe it's just me. Maybe I'm really taking this thing too seriously.

That's how bad I want this thing. The 'only' thing that can give me an affirmation that I have existed in this chosen endeavor that I'm in.

Am I ready?

My poem for my wife made the grade

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The WOOF Contest winners for the week-ending May 15 has been picked.

The poem I wrote for my wife was lucky enough to pass the peer's standards.

Here's the complete list.

WOOF Contest – Top Picks

Poetry

Webbielady – “If I Am God...” - What if I'm given the seat as the God of this universe just for a few hours or a day or a couple of days? A crazy though, a weird poem came out of it...

Jena Isle – “Poems of Adieu and Hello” - What would be more indelible in one's memory, is it saying adieu or hello?

Albert Ashok – “Concerning my land” - Concerning my land- is a concern for my country and the well-being of all concerned with my country.

Dragon Blogger – “A Mother's Love” - A tribute to Mother's everywhere.

Roy – “Don't Ask Me Why” - A poem I wrote for my wife in 1999.

Christable Anon – “The Third Day of May” - How would you address your pain to some deaf wounds?

Zorlone – “Simply A Mother” - The joys of motherhood cannot be expressed in a single poem. But this one tries to have a glimpse of the beauty of such a devoted and unselfish love.

Jennifer M Scott – “Birthday” - 2 months to the day is my birthday and I will be 29 I guess getting older is bothering me some since it seems like I am writing a lot about getting older and losing childhood completely.
Brought to you by PlotDog Press with the Serial Suspense Screenplay "Intervention"

(WOOF participants should re-post all the links above by next Monday. The following links may be excluded as long as you include all the above links.)

Presenting the finest of the writer’s blogs by the bloggers who write them. Highlighting the top posts as chosen by the May 15, 2009 WOOF Contest participants. Want in to join the next WOOF? The next contest ends May 22. Submit a link to your best writing post of the last 3 weeks using the form on this page. Participants, repost the winning link list within a week and you’re all set.

Other WOOF Contestants for 05/15/09

Poetry

Dragon Blogger – “The Hunt For The Pegasus” - Poetry Prose about hunting for Pegasus to save his love.

Roy – “Can we really expect the unexpected?” - Just some words and phrases which have caught my curiosity and wondered if they were really being used correctly.

Dragon Blogger – “Lavender Rain” - Random word poem about mysterious Lavender Rain.

Jennifer M Scott – “Vacancy” - There is a old people's home near my house with a little sign that says "vacancy apply within" This sign inspired this poem.

Jennifer M Scott – “Haiku Series 18- Before Vacation” - I think the title says it all.

Jennifer M Scott – “Reflections” - An acrostic using the word reflections, it is about poem about childhood friends and missing that person.

Short Story / Flash Fiction

Zorlone – “Flood and Traffic are Tears and Choices” - Photographs, lies, love, and selflessness. A flash fiction of a moment in Star's life that left her clinging stranded in a flooded road.

Congratulations to all the winners!

Don't Ask Me Why

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Don't ask me why I love you,
I just do.
I love you not because you
love me back
I just do

Although I may not say it,
Sometimes It may not show,
But believe me,
I do

I love you not for the caring
Nor the thoughtfullness you've shown,
Not for being there
At times when I'm low!

Not for taking care of my children,
Not for making me a home
and not for being patient
of all my imperfections.

Please don't ask me for reasons
'cause I don't need them at all
Because loving you is itself the reason
And nothing else matters anymore

So don't ask me why I love you,
Because I do.

-------------------------------
a poem i wrote for my wife in 1999

Happy Mother's Day Mama!

Birthday... big deal!

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What’s so special about birthdays? Aside from adding one more year to your age, what significance does it really brings?

When you have nothing to prove that all those years of your existence in this planet was something worthwhile, then a birthday means absolutely nothing.

Some people would have a house perhaps to show that they are really working hard… some people commands respect because others have seen that they are so deserving of this… some people developed an enterprise, one that will be their legacy to their children…

…and then, there are some who can leave only nothing but footprints… footprints that gets easily erased and washed away even by the smallest waves. And when that happens, there won’t be any proof of existence of those footprints nor the man who left them.

it matters not…

how many birthdays he had…
how many times he cried…
how loud his laughter was…
how badly bruised he was…

neither here nor there… a candle that couldn’t keep its light… an age that didn’t come with wisdom…

ahhh…. birthday! Others rejoice in it, thankful for the day to come… while others wouldn’t really give a damn.

Is it really significant?

It depends… on who you are… where you are… and how you are…

Birthday? Big deal!